The Wizarding Wireless Network News - Report Three

[Richard Romain]

* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TSJhIZmL0A - for start-up theme*

Henry – Hello and good evening. This is The Wizarding Wireless Network News, I’m Henry Stockett.

Henry – Our top story tonight… as the talks continue in Berlin the ceasefire in Hamburg looks to be growing more fragile by the minute. Aurors and both sides have begun to sporadically open fire on their enemies before stopping. With me here to discuss the possibility of hostilities starting up again are the members of my expert panel. Renowned fighter and instructor Raven Drake.

Raven – I prefer ‘renowned killer’.

Henry – I’ll try to keep that in mind Miss Drake. Sergiy Monomyth, Head of Gryffindor and one of the men who led the British invasion of Hamburg.

Sergiy – It is good to be here.

Henry – Head Healer of St Mungos, Madam Adonna Tonks.

Adonna – Thank you for having me.

Henry – And lastly, the Head Heilung of Germany, Vincent Rain.

Vincent – Hallo.

Henry – Thank you all for coming, I’m aware that you all have busy schedules. Let’s get right down to it shall we? First of all, why do you think that the Aurors on both sides are taking shots at each other when the peace talks are still on-going Miss Drake?

Raven – Isn’t it obvious? If an English pops his head up the only thing for a self-respecting German to do it to make sure the man’s head explodes!

Henry – …

Raven – Or melts. Personally I prefer my heads to explode if I’m not close enough to bleed them dry.

Sergiy – Raven you’re scaring the host.

Raven – No one was talking to you, pervert.

Henry – Actually I was about to ask his opinion on why they’ve been attacking…

Raven – … You’re about ten seconds away from having your head explode. I don’t like it when people contradict me.

Vincent – Raven… play nice. We happen to be in London right now after all.

Raven – And? That just means more targets.

Sergiy – Getting back on topic, I think that the Aurors are taking pot shots at each other because they’re tense. They’ve gone from being on full attack footing to a standstill in the space of an hour.

Adonna – I agree, the human mind needs time to switch emotions and an hour isn’t enough time to go from the emotional state that allows killing men to the emotional state best suited for killing time.

Raven – I like my answer better.

Henry – Thank you Sergiy and Adonna for bringing us back on topic. As our resident healers on this panel, Adonna, Vincent, what are the casualties for both sides since the ceasefire came into effect?

Vincent – Five wounded and seven killed.

Adonna – Six wounded and thirteen killed.

Raven – Perhaps less time worrying about their mental state and more time worrying about their physical state eh Adonna?

Adonna – Are you insinuating and their deaths were due to improper medical care at the hands of my staff?

Raven – Insinuating? No, flat out telling you.

Adonna – How dare you?!

Sergiy – Sit down Adonna, let’s just try to keep this panel going.

Adonna – I will not stay here and have my skills and my integrity brought into question! Goodbye.

Vincent – Not that this wasn’t interesting but I have work to be doing. Goodbye Henry. See you later Raven.

Raven – Bye Vinnie.

Henry – B-but the segment isn’t over…!

Sergiy – I think it is. With only me and Raven this is hardly a panel. Goodbye.

Raven – Well I’d love to stay and play but I’ve got another interview to get to. Seems my son has come down with a sudden case of death. Bye!

Henry – … this is Henry Stockett for WWNN. Thank you for listening and tuned in for The Witching Hour. Goodnight.

* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lu9J_rSUB54 - for ending theme*