Drowning (Kaspar and Lucia)

[Kaspar Kaiser]

Kaspar had been doing what he did best recently.

He had been out drinking, smoking and staying up until the early hours of the morning doing god knows what, and he was enjoying it, but only recently he had been beginning to feel numb even when doing that, it seemed that nothing could mask what had happened and the fool he felt that he had been played for, his heart had been twisted and torn in every direction imaginable and he didn't want to live with the memories, or the pain any longer.

His manager kept having fits at him to stop the drink and get focused on his new material, which he had done, and the album had been taken over by his darkness, and the fans had been chilled at recieving the new side of him when it had been released, but Kaspar didn't much care if they liked the songs or not, they were what he was, what he felt right now, and he found it best to be honest in his work.

Sitting at the bar, he ordered his bottle of vodka, and settled down for another long, and busy night, cigar in hand.

[Lucia Henley]

Lucia had a day off. Finally. And, no, not Briony's fault. She actually stayed behind to make sure she got her job done, even when she was done for the day. It was horrible how much of a workaholic she had become. She sighed and walked out of Hogwarts and to Hogsmeade where she apparated. She smiled. Time to let a bit loose.

She walked into Brimstone with a small smile on her lips. She walked over to the bar near a guy around her own age who was drinking at a bottle of vodka. She decided to let him be while she ordered herself brown rum and coke.

When she got her drink, she paid for it and her eyes landed on the guy next to her again. Hadn't she seen him before? Then her memories flashed and she was in the woods in her white dress walking around barefooted. Kaspar. She contemplated whether or not to say anything to him, when she noticed his eyes. He looked horrible, shot down, dead, evil, nothing like that time.

She frowned and cleared her throat. "Are you all right?" she asked softly.

[Kaspar Kaiser]

Kaspar noted that there were people all around him and they were ordering drinks, but he didn't much care he had his drink and he was set for the night, his eyes fixed on the bar in front of him and he lost himself in thoughts of what had happened in the last meeting with Tamara, and how...how different she was...how cruel.

He was brought out of his thoughts when he heard the voice of a woman beside him, he presumed her comments were directed at himself and he slowly brought his eyes around to lock with her own, and it was then he felt like he should know who this woman was. Maybe they had met a long time ago...

Wracking his brain, he remembered that he met this lady under the most unusual circumstances, and that her name was Lucia Henley.

"I'm surviving, nice to see you again Lucia." he stated "You here with anyone? I wouldn't want to keep you if you are, or even if you're not, I suspect funner patrons than I are here tonight."

[Lucia Henley]

Lucia smiled to him when he recognized her. She hadn't expected that. Then again, she had been walking in the forest with a white dress. It wasn't a very usual circumstance. And she very rarely walked in the forest wearing such things. She found it a bit melodramatic.

"Nice to see you too, Kaspar," she said with a soft smile. She then shook her head. "I'm not here with anyone," she said kindly. She then laughed slightly at what he said and looked around. "Yup, every guy in this room is so kind and awesome that they'd do anything to get a girl to go home with them. Not something I'm up for. I think I'll hang here," she said with an honest gaze.

"Besides, you saw me in a white dress, barefooted in a forest. I get to see you drunk," she pointed out, "And then we'll be even."

[Kaspar Kaiser]

Kaspar couldn't help but feel a little spark of happiness when he found out that Lucia wasn't here with anyone, that would mean that she might actually want to stay with him and talk, whereas many of the other people he had been 'friends' with seemed to all dissappear as soon as he needed a shoulder to cry on, or someone to simply text to take his mind off everything.

"Well you don't have to worry about that from me I can assure you, I'll be more than happy to protect you from the less than honourable intentions of the rest of the men in the bar." he stated with a small smile, taking a shot of vodka afterwards, to give him a bit more dutch courage than he would have had otherwise.

Laughing softly, the sound seeming a little off to him, he hadn't laughed in a while after all, Kaspar recalled the sight of Lucia in the forest and looking back at it now he had to smile to himself, it was such an odd sight and he hadnt reacted like it was at all.

"Yeah that was a little weird if you don't mind me saying, well, you best be buying me my second round then." he smirked "Do you mind if I smoke?" Kaspar asked, gesturing to his unlit cigar.

[Lucia Henley]

Lucia felt a bit relieved when she saw his eyes lighten up a bit. She was happy to know that he didn't find her a nuisance for coming over to talk and stuff. She had worried that he might find it annoying, because he really didn't seem to be in a happy place at the moment.

"Well, I'm glad to hear that there still are men in the world with their manners and morals intact," Lucia said with a grin. She was happy to see the small smile on his face too. He honestly seemed like he hadn't smiled in years. And when he laughed, he seemed a bit put off by it, himself. Something bad had happened.

"That's a deal," she said and turned to the waiter. "Hey, a new shot for this man to celebrate his continuous manners," she said loudly enough to be heard over the noise.

She shook her head. "Nah, smoke away. That is, if you don't mind me asking; what's going on?" she asked softly, knowing he'd understand that she was talking about how sad he seemed.

[Kaspar Kaiser]

Kaspar felt lighter for talking, maybe containing his grief was something that he shouldn't be doing, he only let it out when he sang after all and that wasnt often given the mood that he was in lately, maybe he should get out more often? But then he found his heart and his head telling him no, telling him he would only end up being hurt again.

"They've certainly stood the tests and trials they've been presented with." he stated with a small sad smile, he had wanted to rant and rave and scream at Tamara for what she did to him, but he bit his tongue and kept his feelings inside "Sometimes I wish I could be that little more rude, to people who deserve it of course."

Smiling slightly when his new shot was ordered, Kaspar's expression went stoic when he was asked what had happened, what should he say? Should he be honest and tell Lucia what had really happened...? Maybe she wouldn't care, just like Tamara hadn't cared, maybe she just wanted something and once she had it, would throw him aside.

"Its a long story." he muttered lighting his cigar and taking a deep drag "Depressing and long, I don't want to bring you down."

[Lucia Henley]

Lucia smiled softly. "I get that," she said, knowing she could be all too kind to people most of the time, while she sometimes wanted to scream at the students that they shouldn't be so reckless, and to yell at families for not taking better care of their children, and at the rebels for the lives they had taken. "I wish I was ruder sometimes," she said with a sigh, "But I guess I just can't be what I'm not."

She didn't like the way his face changed from smiling to being stoic and closed off within an instant. She knew what it meant to keep the pain inside, to lock oneself from the world. It never led to anything good. But she didn't want to push him. At the same time, if she didn't ask again, she'd just seem like a shallow person, and she wasn't.

"I can handle dark and depressed," she said honestly, "So if you want to spill, if you feel like you want to, then I'm all ears. And if you want to forget, I promise you a hangover in the morning isn't going to help the pain."

[Kaspar Kaiser]

Kaspar was glad that Lucia seemed to suffer from the same problem that he did, maybe they would have more things in common when they got down to it, maybe they should get to know each other a little bit more, because Kaspar knew for some reason he already felt slightly better for having someone around who actually seemed to give a damn about how he felt, not just how it affected how much money they made.

"I suppose we both suffer with that curse, it bites." he chuckled wryly before taking another shot, letting it burn down his throat with a shiver, he already felt warmer, and that glow was coming over him, he felt more talkative than before "So, what have you been doing lately, anything interesting?"

When Lucia seemed to push lighly, Kaspar thought that maybe she really did want to help and he didn't see how the pain could get any worse than it was right now, so he decided that he would at least give the whole 'caring and sharing' thing a go.

"I loved a woman...creature rather, with all my heart, and she decided to go to sleep for about three years and then blow me off altogether...like...like I meant nothing to her, like she was just bored of playing with me and wanted to drop me at the wayside to move on to something more...interesting." he whispered softly staring into his shot glass.

[Lucia Henley]

Lucia could see it in Kaspar's face that whatever had happened to him, was bad. Not to mention the fact that he was sitting here alone, being sad. That told her that maybe it had something to do with friendships. Someone might have died or something; she really hoped not.

"Yes, it seems so. Some does envy me that, but I find it to be more a curse than a blessing..." she said with a sigh. She then smiled lightly when he asked her what was going on. "Ah, same old same old. Still a teacher at Hogwarts, and I still love it there. But other than that, not much has really happened. What with all the rebels, many students have died, and those left behind suffer more than ever. It's not a good sight for someone who should be happy and innocent. They should be able to cherish their lives," she said with a sigh, thinking of the many students that she sometimes saw looked terribly sad.

When Kaspar told her what was going on, she realized that friendships were not the bad part, but what he really needed. But she couldn't imagine him not having any friends. Maybe because he was famous, though. That could be it. Either way, she realized he really needed someone he could depend on.

"Oh, honey," she said softly, placing her hand on his arm. "I'm so sorry to hear that. I just don't understand why a per- creature would do that to you. You seem so kind," she said, her eyes compassionate. When it came to love and heartbreak, Lucia was a stranger, but she was no stranger to the pain of losing someone. She sighed and then took his hand, looking him deeply into his eyes. "But she didn't deserve you. No one decent would do that to a person who can't get mad at others," she said softly.

[Kaspar Kaiser]

Kaspar knew that the world around him was full of darkness and depression, however his hope for at least some happiness had kept him going, and now that it was gone he might as well have just died as well, what was left for him now but a career which would only feel empty? He knew he should get help but, he didn't want to.

"Yes, although they've gone to Ireland or some such place now, to escape from the country, I guess wherever they're gone, it's better that they're there causing havock, than here." he sighed and tipped some more of his vodka in the bottle into his shot glass.

Almost jumping a little bit when Lucia placed her hand on his arm, Kaspar felt a little better at the contact with someone, and he was glad for the conversation, instead of someone just throwing unhelpful annoying comments about how he was acting towards him and hoping he would take on their advice.

"That's what they always say 'She didn't deserve you', maybe it's true, maybe it isn't but it sure doesn't stop me from feeling like crap, I don't feel like I can trust anyone again, I feel too...lost to even think about what I should do." he sighed "But like I said, I don't want to bring you down, and this conversations not going down the 'cheerful' route."

[Lucia Henley]

Lucia smiled softly at him. She guess she was glad that they had left Britain, but she really didn't feel safe either way. It wasn't okay that they were still fighting, but knowing that they weren't targeting the students at Hogwarts anymore, helped Lucia a great deal.

"That's true, but one shouldn't cope so well with the injustice that doesn't hit yourself, you know. I really wish they'd stop the rebellions. They haven't done anything good. I mean, they started out, fighting for peace, and they created a new war. I don't get it," she said with a sigh.

She nodded. She had a boyfriend once, and though their love hadn't been so strong, she had felt angry when people said that he didn't deserve her. When it came down to it, no human deserved another, because all humans were so different. So she felt a bit stupid for having said that to Kaspar now.

"I know. I know what you mean. Hearing such things rarely helps. And when it comes to trust... I think trust is overrated. You don't need to trust others to be happy amongst others. A lot of things has happened in my life, and currently, there is no one in the world I trust. Not my family, not my friends, not anyone, but I am happy even so," she said, though not all of it was true. She was on good way to trust Briony. That woman was amazing in so many ways.

"You wouldn't bring me down, but I don't feel like making you tell me too much, because I don't want to bring you down. So, let's talk about other things. How is it going with work?" she asked kindly, not having any idea that it wasn't going to well.

[Kaspar Kaiser]

Kaspar shrugged his shoulders, he really didn't care what was going on with the rebellions now, although they wwre still in hiding he thought that they would be more than likely to come out of it when the danger was gone, although they would never be able to return to the country they loved so dearly.

"They've recieved punishment for what they have done in an odd way, the country they loved and protected so ardently, they are now barred from, never to be able to return without imprisonment. Ironic." he muttered.

Not really feeling the same way as Lucia when she mentioned that trust was overrated, Kaspar shook his head and laughed softly, to him, being able to trust someone used to come so easily, it was a big part of him, and that part had altered making him more cold and distant than his old friendly self.

"I disagree, to me, trust was so important, yet I trusted everyone implicitly, I guess this is my lesson, to learn not to do that any more and I certainly have learnt it well." he smirked to himself, filling and draining another shot glass.

Then the subject of work was broached.
Even more depressing news.

"Well I jsut released another album, many fans loved it as they always do but they noticed how dark my work had become, apparently that's split them 50/50 as to whether thats a good or bad thing."

[Lucia Henley]

Lucia sighed. It wasn't really a topic she was keen on discussing, so she merely nodded to what Kaspar was saying. In all honesty, the rebels had it coming, but she thought them cowards from feeling from their lands, their cause, instead of facing the punishment with their heads held high.

Lucia gave a soft smile. "I don't remember much from my childhood, but those things I do remember, I wish to forget. There is a reason I don't trust people, after all. I didn't just wake up one day and figure that, hey, why not stop trusting people. And it hurt. It hurt a lot, but you'll come to see that though it hurts now, your body will adapt to the pain," she said softly, "And I know that might not be what you want to hear now."

The look on Kaspar's face when he told her what was happening, wasn't really a very happy look. But Lucia should've known that his music would be impacted by the breakup of someone he seemed to have loved very dearly. Lucia wondered who this woman was. Why would anyone want to cause such pain to another human being?

"I see. Well, maybe I'll by the album. I was always a fan of dark music, maybe it'll be appealing to me," she said, "Though I've always had a strong liking of love songs too, if I'm not too bold to say."

Lucia wanted to change the subject, but she didn't quite know what to change it to. She could always as what he did in his spare time, but she had a feeling that someone this heartbroken wouldn't do much more than drink, watch TV, work or anything else. But she wanted to make him a bit happier.

"Did you see the Quidditch match between the Holyhead Harpies and the Heidelberg Harriers? I don't think I've seen a more exciting game for a while," she said with big eyes, meaning it. It had been a thrilling match between Wales' team and Germany's team.

[Kaspar Kaiser]

Kaspar was a little bit disturbed by the fact that Lucia was telling him that he was going to have to learn to deal with the pain of not being able to trust. He had wanted to hear that it would get better in the fullness of time, not be told that it was going to be as awful as it was now forever, that he'd just get used to it instead,

"I don't really want to have to learn to adapt to a constant pain, a constant pain caused by an oh so noticable absense." he told her quietly before sighing a little bit, "But I guess I asked for the truth. I got it."

He smirked ever so softly. His music might have gotten darker but one of the songs he was still able to do just as well as before was love songs. The thing just seemed so easy to him,

"Well the new album has dark songs and love songs." he told her with a small smile, "Although one of the love songs is pretty dark too I'll admit."

Recognising that she was trying to change the subject of conversation to something less depressing, he chuckled a little bit before nodding,

"Yeah I saw it." he told her before shaking his head a little bit, "The Heidelberg seeker should be locked up for that awful tackle on the Holyhead keeper. I meant seriously, she drove the poor woman face first into the goal post."

[Lucia Henley]

Lucia smiled softly. "I didn't mean it like that. Honestly, I'm sure you'll find it in yourself to trust others again. And as for the pain-part, to use a very weird example. It's like when someone slaps your thigh. At first, it doesn't seem quite real, then the pain is enhanced and hurts like hell for a slightly long time, before it lessens, because your body adapts. Adaption is the most important ability of human beings. Otherwise, we'd all be stuck in the stone age still," she said calmly, hoping he'd understand, "The pain will be there always, but it will be more a part of you than it will be something cutting you, and though that might not seem like a good thing, it really is."

She smiled at that. She'd have to buy the new album then. An album with dark songs and love songs were her favorites. Maybe because she hadn't gotten so much of it herself. She certainly wasn't tired of it.

"Well then. I know what to buy myself the next time I'm in Diagon Alley or another place where they sell your music," she said with a smile, "And a mixture between dark and love is often the things people associate to, in other words, you'll be speaking directly to your audience, and I think that's brilliant."

Lucia nodded. She remembered. The Harpies had gotten a penalty for that, which had been well used, but still, to have people acting like that in Quidditch ought to have led to expulsion from the team.

"Yeah, not to mention the fact that the Quaffle was in the other end of the field. The keeper is supposed to be safe when the Quaffle is that far away. But no," she said with a slight shrug. She liked talking Quidditch. She had been on the team when she went to Hogwarts as a Chaser. She had really enjoyed that.

"I played Quidditch at Hogwarts myself, actually. I think that was the most amazing time I had at the school," she said softly, feeling a bit sad about that really; her life at Hogwarts was a blur she mostly didn't remember, but the things she did remember was Quidditch, on the good side, and all the students that used her on the bad side. She hadn't had any friends at Hogwarts, really. The four last years she couldn't recall at all either, as if they had been so bad that her brain had blocked them out to keep her safe.

[Kaspar Kaiser]

Listening to her speak, Kaspar was suddenly very aware that she did work in a school. It seemed like there was good reason for this too as she had flawlessly gone into a mini-lecture mode and he was still hanging on her words. That was weird. In school lectures and teachers talking usually put him straight to sleep,

"Well I think I will trust others again. It's just going to take a little bit longer." he chuckled a little bit at the slapped thigh example, "Okay that has got to be the weirdest metaphor that you could have used right there. Oh well, it's gotten through to me though so maybe there's a trick to weird metaphors? Ideas for a new song at least..."

He chuckled a little bit when she said that she'd have to go and buy his album, scratching the back of his head slightly sheepishly,

"Yeah well you should be able to get my album anywhere good music is sold." he assured her before snorting, "Even on wIzTunes. You know that side of ITunes that muggleborns set up for magical music?"

As the talk turned to Quidditch Kaspar had to remind himself to stayed very focused on the conversation. Mainly because he wasn't a huge fan of Quidditch and to keep up in a conversation about the sport he had to have quite a lot of context behind everything. He smiled a little bit,

"I never knew that you played yourself." he smiled a little bit wider, "What position did you play?"

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